I thought I would be brave Saturday. I needed one item in Walmart and thought we could be in and out with no problems (even with the amount of people). Of course when I go to Walmart, I don’t walk out with just one item. I needed some groceries too. No biggie, in and out with no problems.
Until it came time to check out. I was stupid enough to listen to the person telling us that certain checkouts were ready. Ummm, I can see that for myself and check to see what type of checker is there. I get creeped out by some checkers and know from past experience which ones to avoid.
But I was in a hurry and thought that we could be out within another few minutes.
I was wrong; REALLY wrong.
We got stuck behind this stupid chick. I didn’t see what all she had to purchase until it was too late. She had more than two dozen stupid health bars that had to be scanned in individually. When I saw that I turned to the husband and rolled my eyes. I’m sure I said something unpleasant (but in a nice way because I don’t know how to be mean).
When the cashier had all two dozen plus stupid health bars scanned and bagged, the stupid chick pulled out a wad of coupons. Here in lies my problem. I should have looked right at the stupid chick and started making a scene. Instead, being the Wall Flower that I am, I turned to the husband and said more unpleasant things about the stupid chick.
Of course this stupid chick is trying to do the “coupon” thing but has no fucking clue. She handed the cashier a wad of coupons but didn’t organize them or categorize them like you’re supposed to. The cashier had to have a manager come over and go through each individual coupon, organizing them and categorizing them as best they could. When they got through the stack of coupons, the manager told the stupid chick she could only use two coupons per type of stupid health bar.
The stupid chick then pulls out a printed policy page from the Walmart store. Seriously?!!? You gotta be fucking kidding me?!?! Death stares directly at this stupid chick. By that time, we’d already been standing in line for five minutes and had food ready to be checked out. I was getting seriously impatient.
So the manager tells the stupid chick she can only have two per coupon and asked if she wanted the stupid health bars. She said yes but then the poor cashier had to rescan each of the unwanted stupid health bars and bag them. OMG SERIOUSLY?!?!?!?! Yet another five minutes of standing there waiting. The stupid chick proceeded to argue with the manager and the cashier saying it was Walmart policy but the manager couldn’t convince the stupid chick. The manager then went in search of a different manager.
The second manager looked at the coupons and proceeded to tell the stupid chick that she could have one stupid health bar per serial code per coupon. The stupid chick started to argue more so they brought a higher up manager. So the third manager had the highest say and said one stupid health bar per coupon and walked away as did the other managers. As the first manager walked past us, she rolled her eyes and I had to laugh. We all were feeling the pain and understood our irritation.
But when the stupid chick realized she was going to have to “gasp” PAY “gasp” for her items, she said she didn’t want them. YOU BITCH. You Are Kidding Me?!?! You’ve stood here wasting our time for the past ten minutes and now you’ve decided that because you are going to have to pay for the items instead of getting them for free that you’ll not pay?!?! Never mind you’ve wasted MY time. I should have told her she owed me money for taking up my time.
Luckily the cashier was really nice. I felt bad for the guy. I guess we were only his second customer, what a way to start the day.
I did learn a few things:
- Never shop in Walmart on a Saturday.
- Never listen to the person directing you to which checkout. Tell them you aren’t ready yet.
- Although most people checking out of Walmart on a Saturday look like retards, try to find the least retarded person.
- If someone in front of you has more than three items of the same thing, move to a different checkout.
- Never ever do couponing on a Fucking Saturday unless you want to start a fight.
- Next time I won't be a Wall Flower; I’ll be rude and start causing a scene when someone pulls out a dozen coupons.
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